Have you noticed how everyone appears to be angry these days? I popped out in my car to go to my mothers just yesterday. Now I admit when you drive a bright orange, customized VW Beetle, heads do turn. Hiding is impossible; even in thick fog… it’ll stand out like sore thumb. The flip side is also that drivers like to run me off the road. On my drive to my mothers just yesterday a small Nissan truck came racing up behind me. Now you have to know I live in the country. When I have been into the USA or Australia in the country the roads appear to be massively wide. In the UK country roads tend to be the width of one car. So this angry driver drove so close I could almost feel his breath against my neck. When I looked in my rear mirror his face was purple. Not only was he ugly, but he also looked furious. Why? No idea, all I know was he wanted to pass me urgently. Eventually, after driving under pressure for almost 15 minutes with a mental Nissan driver behind me looking like beetroot in color waiting to explode, I pulled over so he could pass. As he passed, he slowed next to me opened his windows, screamed abuse at me, stuck his finger up at me. I looked back and smiled at him. I think this made him madder than a Bull to a red flag. I drove on until I got to the lights some 3 miles down the road. Who should be in front of me at the lights? Yes… Mr. Beetroot head struggling to pass the next driver he wanted to vent his anger at!
It’s not just drivers though is it? On TV everyone is angry. In the streets, people look angry. In the shops, men and women are angry. At the airport (don’t get me started on Airport staff!) … also look angry. Isn’t that sad? Why are people looking so angry? What is anger? Let me quote from a mental health resource in 2008… “Anger is a basic human emotion that is experienced by all people. Typically triggered by an emotional hurt, anger is usually experienced as an unpleasant feeling that occurs when we think we have been injured, mistreated, opposed in our long-held views, or when we are faced with obstacles that keep us from attaining personal goals.
People also vary in how easily they get angry (their anger threshold), as well as how comfortable they are with feeling angry. Some people are always getting angry while others seldom feel angry. Some people are very aware of their anger, while others fail to recognize anger when it occurs. Some experts suggest that the average adult gets angry about once a day and annoyed or peeved about three times a day. Other anger management experts suggest that getting angry fifteen times a day is more likely a realistic average. Regardless of how often we actually experience anger, it is a common and unavoidable emotion” Did you see that in that paragraph? It said …” Other anger management experts suggest that getting angry fifteen times a day is more likely a realistic average. Regardless of how often we actually experience anger, it is a common and unavoidable emotion” I challenge the above.
Anger is an unavoidable emotion and can be controlled. Here’s a fact I want you to ask yourself. After you have been angry do you feel uplifted, happy and full of life? Or … Do you feel depleted, flat and lifeless with a long recovery process? You know that point when you are about to break into anger? Imagine yourself there now. Look for a pattern. Can you see what it is? I have to look at myself here. When I am angry I am also a sulker. I feel bad. I feel flat. I feel low. It takes me a while to get back into the groove after being angry. So if I am angry as suggested above FIFTEEN TIMES DAILY … I would be a road-wreck waiting to happen. So I have had to learn a new skill in life. It’s to hold back and not be angry. What is anger again? Anger is a switch. It’s a point that you are challenged inside. It’s so deep it can’t be seen. Its that point where that small tiny switch is flick, not once, not twice, not three time. It’s flicked to the point where it literally erupts. I suggest you can absorb those provocative attacks. When you feel angry you need to absorb whatever it is hitting your switch.
Can I share what I do? I simply take a huge deep breath and say to myself… “It means nothing, let it go. It isn’t personal, it’s not about me, and the anger is about THEM” I will repeat that time and time again to myself (not in an airy-fairy way more in a strong practical manly way) and you know what happens/ Within minutes the potential anger has gone. It’s been put out. It has vanished.
But the point I really want to get to is this: How does anger affect your business and your life? According to the above, it seems to affect lots of lives at least 15 times a day. At 15 times a day that could eat and destroy a huge part of your day. That, in turn, could create a less productive life for you.
That tells me our customers and clients are more impatient than ever. That tells me our buyers or prospects want more satisfaction. That tells me we have to research more than ever before the precise needs of our customers.
Let’s be honest here, life is wonderful. The birds are beautiful. The sky is stunning regardless of the weather. The animals make us smile. Deep down people are good. Angry people want to be good. Can you find out more about your customer? Do you do that? Can you do that? You can create a strong, integrity based business that could bring in profits, sales and a lifestyle beyond your wildest dreams. Anger is destructive. It’s sad. It’s painful. In an Age of Rage, I challenge the 15 times a day above … Anger can be controlled and understood for life and business. How about you? Let me know what you think below.
Quote: “What I’ve learned about being angry with people is that it generally hurts you more than it hurts them”. Oprah Winfrey.
Alan Forrest Smith