Adulterous Bitch?

Music Teacher and Married Mother of 5 Runs off With 25 Year Old Music Student

Adulterous Bitch!

Shocking right but true. Or is it?

Just a few doors away from me lives a lady of 74 years old.

Just yesterday as I was putting out some washing to dry I heard a voice shout ‘Alan, Alan’

I went to the path to see this frail, unstable woman calling me. It was my neighbor Hilary.

She wanted to talk. Honestly I was busy yet I knew she wanted some time so I sat down and listened.

I asked how she was? She has got shingles and clearly lost a lot of weight. I asked her… ‘where is Roger?’. Roger is her husband.

She replied…

‘we are still deeply in love you know from the day we met’

Interesting I thought as I never asked her anything like that but she still offered to tell me that.

I smiled, she smiled, she then told me her story.

She said…

‘There’s a big age gap you know. I am 21 years older than him. I am now 74 and he is 53′.

I sat in silence and listened.

‘Yes we met when he was at college. He was just 23 and I was 44, married with 5 children’

We were in love right away. Can you imagine the scandal? It’s always ok for an older man to be with a younger woman but when an older woman is with a younger man it’s a scandal.’

I just smiled and sat there in the sun soaking up the story.

She lifted her small thin arm to her mouth. Took the remaining half a cigarette from a time earlier in the day, put it to her mouth, lit it and carried on.

Looking back it was a crazy time. All the town were in uproar. My husband followed us for years and years. My children were devastated, his parents went absolutely crazy over it and we spent years at war with everyone and anyone. It was a very hard time’

I asked her one question… ‘what got you through it’

She replied ‘love’

I smiled at her and she said…

Yes… Just pure love, not lust or sex just a deep understanding of each other at every level.

We locked ourselves away, loved each other and created music’

She then went on to tell me another story of how she sold over 60,000 copies of her Celtic Music CD that they had created in their bedroom studio just 3 doors away from my home. Turns out she plays almost anything with strings, he is a genius violinist and they are wonderfully happy till this day in love.

She smiled, told me about her illness and then had another cigarette. She looked at me in the eye and said…

‘Don’t worry Alan, I know, it’ll all be fine’

She knows I’m divorced. She knows I have 4 kids. She knows I have had love and lost love.

She smiled, held my hand and went back into her home.

I walked back into my own home totally inspired by her story and I want to tell you why.

This lady had done something most young people haven’t done.Lived and lived to tell her story.

She has been through the eye of the storm at many levels and survived. She is a survivor of LIFE and a lover in the truest sense.

Both her and her lover (they have never married) still adore each other to this day. The age gap is painfully obvious at the physical level yet to see them together it would be easy to judge what or who they are.

Have you ever done that? Seen something, someone and made a call of some kind in your mind about them. IF you get the chance to know them, they weren’t what you thought they were in fact they were the absolute opposite to what you expected.

Yet based on your conditioning, based on your own measurement of right and wrong you made a judgment.

Yet think about this; in life you are really only responsible for one person… YOU.

And when faced with the truth of YOU most of us back away, go into denial, brush everything over with huge helping of Ego.

Why is that?

Because of fear. Fear of who? Fear of what others will think. So because we fear the opinions of others we develop and create false realities.

Think about this for my neighbor all those years ago. She told me people were saying she is a pervert, adulteress and child snatcher because of what she did.

The reality was she was desperately unhappy and because of that she decided to leave her husband, forsake her kids for a while and jump into the fire with a younger man that she loved and he loved her.

Was that wrong?

We could say yes but who’s level or standard do we Measure it against? The standards of others. Standards of God. Standards of truth?

And the simple truth is we live in a world where the talk, the gossip, the lives of others have taken on more meaning than our own.

Wherever you go you will hear of others talking about others. Judging, condemning, putting someones life right without ever bothering to look at their own.

And here’s what I learned.

Give time to those that need your time. Honestly I couldn’t be bothered but after 30 minutes of listening I was truly glad I did listen.

Hold back from judging and listen to the whole story. When you really look at the bigger picture its easy to see both sides.

Remove yourself from their life. You can only judge them if you try and put them into your shoes, your mind, your thoughts. Yet why would you do that if you would hate someone else to think of you in that way?

The 74 year old lady next door is happy. She is in love. Her man is happy. He’s clearly in love. They have dedicated themselves to each other since the first day despite all the problems they encountered.

Her children love her and are around all the time. Her children love him. Time healed everything. It’s fine for them.

You know…

The doorway to happiness is what we create. The life we need to create our happiness is the life we create. When we think, think, think about what we want in life, it appears, the laws of attraction whether we know them are not kick into action and make it happen.

But Ultimately… it’s up to us, it’s up to YOU.

I’d love to know what you thinking? Let me know.